Routine

So, today's the day I can no longer avoid it. I have to fish or cut bait with this practice story.

It is, conceivably, somewhere I can just leave it. The two leads are together. I can just stop if I want to. I might disappoint some people, but one's imagination can fill in the blanks by now, if that's what I need.

But I'm not sure it is. I think I personally might need to see this through to the end, to my own satisfaction. I know that I have finished a section of the overall piece, but I'm thinking that I need to go ahead and write the rest of what's lurking in my head.

While this might seem like a no-brainer, it's actually not. Because while I do this, I'm not writing original work, and therefore there is no hope for me to get paid.

On the other hand (there's always another one), with a little tweaking I could probably turn this into original work, and it's teaching me a lot about handling a large plot. So it's hardly time wasted.

You can probably see where this is going. I'll do it, but I think a bit more slowly and carefully. I've felt for the past several months like this story has become my life, and anything I do outside it is dream-time, to borrow a concept. It's just taken over everything I have, and I'm not entirely comfortable with that either. That is probably the biggest source of my disquiet: I have not created time to work on it and then time for everything else. No boundaries, no time management, no routine, no schedule. I'm really good at chaos. But I stink at creating routine. There is something about it both comforting and punishing, and I have no explanation for that outside of petty self-indulgence. Might as well call a spade 'a spade' and get on with fixing it.

So I'm trying to figure out The Routine this morning so I can finally get on with this thing. I've heard tell that routines actually stimulate the brain. This will be pretty much my first time, so I'll let you know.