Happy Groundhog Day! And a bit of grousing...

And of course, Blessed Imbolc and Candlemas, and Happy Sled Dog Day and African American Coaches Day!

And a belated Happy Working Naked Day -- that was yesterday. Hope at least some of you celebrated that one.

Ok, now that's out of the way, I'll grouse: let's talk about how pesky reality can be. You see, I have this character who I know has a specific condition. This isn't negotiable about this man. That's what the situation is. But...how? How did it happen? What does it mean now? Is it treatable? Reversible? I know it's not contagious -- at least I have that much nailed down! But, what I thought the situation was has changed. I did a little research.

And now all story-hell has broken loose.

I know what he suffers from and I know how he suffers and I know what it means for him both internally and externally. This thing defines him. It's not negotiable. But from all the reading I did yesterday -- my heart sinking every word of the way -- what I originally thought caused his issue just can't be the cause. It's not medically possible. So now I am left with having to dig very deep into his business right away to figure out what happened to him, to leave him in this position.

Ugh.

This means, in larger terms, that the weirdo first draft of this story I wrote way back in 2006 has to be almost completely thrown out. Now, I wrote that initially to follow the ideas I had about this man and the town he lives in. Initially, I did not intend or expect a viable story to come out it. But I grew deeply attached to him and I can't just abandon him now. I have to figure his stuff out, and I feel a duty to tell his story. He's a decent guy. He needs this.

But it leaves me in a difficult spot as the author: how he presents himself isn't medically possible. Not to mention the colossal re-write I'm looking at! I suppose this can mean there's a psychological component I need to investigate. But he's both really solid internally and really compromised physically. So, what gives? I need to figure out what gives.

Normally, I love this part of writing, even when it makes me feel like I'm not doing anything. It's true that I'm not putting too many words on the page when I have to think things through. But I still consider it writing, because this very process is what eventually produces the words on the page. So it's fun, to me, and I love the investigation and the discovering the angle I need to use, to see the story right.

But this time I did it backwards and it's really coming back to haunt me. What I thought was, isn't at all. It can't be. So now I'm frustrated, at both physical science and my own impatience.

I guess the moral of the story is, as usual, measure twice and cut once. LOL I've had other stories where I did most of the thinking ahead of time and it worked out a bit better. So, thinking cap on I suppose.

Tomorrow is Create a Vacuum Day. You take that anyway you need to, 'k?

xx mm